Love Potion No. 02, Part 1
by ShinraWeapon
Summary: Be careful what you wish for, you just might get it! Duo learns this lesson after a love potion breaks and Heero falls in love with him...the day before his wedding to Relena! ~~Warning!! Yaoi Content~~ Please R/R


*****Hi, all! Okay, so there I was chatting with a friend of mine regarding magic and spells and stuff when he suddenly made a comment about love potions. Right then and there, this fic came into my mind and I just had to type it up. I am highly Relena-phobic and so any chance to get her away from Heero is a blessing for me. Please note that in the title, "02" refers to Duo's code name from the series and not just a typo. ^_^ Enjoy! *****

~Love Potion No. 02~

Part 1: Be Careful What You Wish For

By ShinraWepn

"Quatre, will you top fussing?!" Duo pushed the blonde's hands away, fending off the tape measure that kept trying to wrap itself around his body like a constricting snake. Quatre sighed and backed away, pulling some pins from his mouth and sticking them back into the pin cushion he held. His expression was worried and vexed.

"These things always happen at the last minute," he moaned. "I knew we should have had the tuxedos tailor made instead of simply ordering them from a catalogue." Duo snorted and started tugging off the jacket.

"Yeah, well, I wasn't about to spend all day shopping like some girl for an outfit I'm only going to wear once." The jacket went into a heap on the bed. The pants, belt, and shirt followed shortly after. Clad only in his socks, undershirt, and a pair of black boxers with skulls on them, the braided youth flopped down on his back onto the bed. Quatre made a shocked gasp and hurriedly picked up the clothing.

"Now look what you did, Duo," he complained. "You wrinkled everything! I just ironed it all this morning..."

"Oh, calm down Q-man! I'll iron it later if it makes you happy."

Quatre turned appealing eyes to Trowa who lounged by the window. His back was against the wall and he was staring down from their hotel room to the street below. "Just look at these measurements," the blonde cried, waving the tape measure in the air. "The sleeves are too long and the pants are too tight..."

"I have a nice package. Might as well show it off, right?" Duo chuckled with a wink. Quatre blushed at the remark and pouted cutely. Trowa smiled softly to himself and turned his attention away from the window. 

"Don't worry," he said calmly. "I'm almost positive that no one will notice how Duo's sleeves are dragging on the floor or how his pants look painted on." Quatre turned the full force of his pout onto his lover, his lower lip trembling a bit.

"You're making fun of me, aren't you?" he accused. Trowa shook his head fondly.

"Don't worry so much, small one. Things are not as bad as they seem."

"He's right, you know. I don't think too many people are going to pay much attention to me. I'm not the one who needs to make a good impression," Duo said softly. He swallowed as if something were caught in his throat and then cleared it, rolling onto his side and putting his face into one of the pillows. Heero's pillow. 

"That's true," Quatre agreed, setting aside his tape measure and picking up a checklist and a pen from the night stand. "Allah only knows how Heero's tuxedo fits. He's never around to try it on."

"Too busy signing prenuptials," Wufei commented, exiting the bathroom. He was wearing a white terry-cloth robe and was vigorously toweling his hair. "Zechs never really did accept the idea of having Heero as his new brother-in-law. I think he wants Relena to settle down with someone who's not quite so excitable."

"He's not that bad," Duo half whispered, inhaling the scent that still lingered on the pillowcase. Wufei glanced over at the braided boy, raised his hand to look like a gun, and smirked.

"Omae o korosu, sound familiar, Maxwell?" 

"So, we all have the wedding presents wrapped and the cards signed, right?" Quatre cut in before Duo and Wufei ended up in a scrap. Though they all were close, sometime the needling between the two of them could go a bit too far. Duo stood up and brushed past Wufei, pulling some clean clothes out of the dresser.

"I haven't gotten their present yet," he explained as he pulled on some black jeans, a black T-shirt with a picture of Deathscythe Hell on the front, a black leather jacket, and a pair of black combat boots which clashed badly with his white socks. Quatre's pen dropped from his nerveless fingers and hit the floor with all the sound of a nuclear bomb in the sudden stillness following Duo's announcement. Ever so slowly, he turned to face his friend.

"You...haven't...what?" The little blonde's voice was a cool whisper and his blue-green eyes were frosty. Duo backed towards the door, hands raised above his head in surrender. 

"I'm going to find a gift, already. Sheesh! Don't get your panties in a knot, Quatre. I'll be back in a little while, with a present, and wrap it in front of you so you know I did it, okay?" He opened the door and blew a kiss to them. "By the way, maybe you should lie down for a while. The stress before the wedding seems to be getting to you."

"Why you...you...!" Quatre sputtered, trying to find a polite way to vent his frustration. In the end, all he was able to do was stomp his foot and throw the checklist to the floor. Duo chuckled and left the room unharmed. Wufei curled his lip, muttered about being surrounded by weaklings, and went to find a comb. Quatre started to sniffle pathetically and went to seek comfort in Trowa's arms. "He's going to ru-ruin everything!" 

Trowa stroked Quatre's back and hair softly, rocking from side to side. "Shh, you know he doesn't mean to upset you. He's Duo, a whirlwind of energy that simply has no direction."

"I was following a s-s-schedule!"

"I think he just wanted some time alone. Heero is the only one who doesn't see just how much this wedding is hurting Duo." The Arabian wiped his eyes on his sleeve and rested his cheek against his lover's shoulder.

"I guess you are right about that. I always knew Heero and Relena would probably end up getting married, but I also privately hoped he'd grow out of it."

Trowa guided his partner over to the bed and together they stretched out, entangling limbs together so that it was hard to tell where one began and the other left off. "You can't blame Heero. Relena is an attractive girl. She has power and wealth and is madly in love with him." He gave a short laugh. "He also has Zechs threatening him with bodily harm if he continues to dally with his precious sister." Quatre snuggled closer, rubbing his perky little nose against Trowa's neck.

"But Duo is madly in love with him too. And I'd threaten Heero myself if I could actually think of something that would phase him. I could order blueberry pancakes tomorrow. He hates those." 

"That's right, love. I'm sure you'll be remembered in history as the one who threatened the perfect soldier with high cholesterol and clogged arteries."

"You're teasing me again," Quatre giggled. 

"Of course. You were getting too serious. It doesn't suit you. Your lips weren't made to frown, but to smile." He looked into blue-green pools set in soft white skin. "Just as your eyes weren't made to cry, but to dance." Quatre giggled again.

"Boy, that was corny," he said. "But it was sweet." Unwinding from his lover, he poked Trowa in the side. "Come on. I still need to get your tuxedo fixed." Sighing, Trowa started to pull of his turtleneck so he could change. _Some things_, he reflected, _never changed_. 

* * * * *

The downtown streets were crowded with curiosity chops. Little old ladies or kindly elderly gentlemen managed the stores in this area. Here one could find everything from tobacco to crochet quilts, chipped china and antique furniture to used bookstores and vintage clothing stores. Small outdoor cafes could be found here as well where starving artist types could gather to discuss philosophy and neo-post-modern sculptures over large cups of mocha latte. Street vendors hawked their wares to anyone gullible enough to stop and listen to their fast-talking deals. All this and more was the world into which Duo now found himself as he paid off the cabby and began to meander through the crowd.

He avoided the vendors who called out for him to pause and admire fine silver cuff links, fresh fruit, and kaleidoscopes made of stained glass. He kept mainly to himself, occasionally glancing up from his shoes to avoid walking into someone or something. He paused a few times to window shop, but nothing looked appealing to him at all. "Okay, Maxwell," he said, imitating Wufei's stern voice, "Time to stop being weak and get the job done. Pick a store and go with it." Nodding to himself, he closed his eyes, spun in a circle, and pointed. Opening his eyes, he saw that he had chosen a little store across the street. A wooden sign hung over the door and was painted red with the picture of a blue dragon on it. "Hmm. Interesting choice, but oh well." Switching to Heero's nasal monotone, he nodded. "Mission, accepted."

The store was even smaller then it had looked on the outside, Duo realized as he entered the cramped and dark confines. Wedging his way between stacks of leather books on the floor and shelves filled to nearly overflowing with assorted junk, he made his way to the front. He wasn't too sure if there would be anything in here he could get away with presenting to the bride and groom as a wedding present. If it was anything less than splendid, Quatre would throw a fit and make him go get another gift. With a sigh, he realized that the owner of the shop wasn't behind the counter and that he'd have to browse around for a while. 

Taking an isle, he started with shelf number one. On it were glass boxes with cheap looking jewelry. Locks prevented anyone from reaching inside to take something out. Duo snorted to himself. He seriously doubted any self-respecting thief would stoop low enough to rip off costume jewelry, but he supposed one could never be too careful. A pair of matched rings caught his eye but after looking at the price, he changed his mind. For what they were asking, he could probably buy something bigger and prettier than a couple scraps of tarnished-looking gold.

Moving further down, he saw a variety of miscellaneous stuff like Native American dream catchers and statues fashioned to hold bits of turquoise in them. They were pretty enough, but Duo reflected that Relena might take offense if he presented Heero with something to ward off bad dreams and evil spirits. Isn't a wife supposed to do that for her husband? That thought threw the braided young man even deeper into depression. Who was he kidding? He was the one who really needed a dream catcher. As the wedding day drew ever closer, the nightmares of having to watch Heero say those two fated words, "I do", robbed him of his sleep. 

Something shiny in the next isle caught his attention as he wandered around. There were perfume bottles of every make and color situated in untidy clumps, the light of the afternoon sun making them throw their colors onto the wall behind them in a myriad of sparkles. Some of the bottles were marked, others were not. Some had perfume in them, and others were empty. A garish purple bottle towered above the others, taking up space rather like a fat woman on a crowded subway might. If bottles could talk, Duo felt certain that it would have been loudly complaining that the other bottles were in the way of it's overly large girth. 

Carefully pushing aside the other bottles, he reached for the purple one. The label on the bottle read "Love Potion No. 2" on it in fancy gold letters. The back read, "Enhance any romantic moment with our stunning fragrance. Suitable for both men and women, Love Potion No. 2 guarantees the highest quality of scents that are sure to leave your lover breathless!" Shaking it, the young man was disappointed to find that it was empty. What sort of store sold a perfume brand with no perfume in it? Still, maybe he could find it in another store if the smell was pleasant...

His fingers wrapped around the stopper and were just preparing to open it when a cry that sounded like a cat having it's tail pulled nearly scared him out of his wits. A bony and liver-spotted hand clamped down on his wrist, painfully digging into his skin. An woman who looked to be nearing the latter half of her life extracted the bottle from his hand and waved it under his nose. "You foolish boy!" she scolded in a raspy European accent as she clutched the bottle protectively to her chest. She was dressed in a many layered skirt, each part a different color then than the last one. A fluffy white blouse was covered by a fine silk shawl that draped over her shoulders. Rings, bracelets, and necklaces jingled as she moved and two gold hoops dangled nearly to her chin from each ear. A handkerchief was tied onto her head and looked like it held a shock of long, white, curly hair out of her face. Her eyes were hazy and unfocused, the young man noted, and her posture was stooped so much that she was, in fact, smaller than him. That didn't help prevent gravity from messing with her body and it was rather apparent that Father Time was severely beating the woman with an ugly stick. Duo attempted to pull his wrist free from the woman's grasp.

"What's your problem, lady?" he snapped. "I only wanted to see if it was any good! It's not like I was planning to drop it or anything!" But the woman held on fast and shoved the bottle into his face until the gold label blurred in his vision as his eyes crossed.

"You do not know what power you have almost tampered with, boy," she stated darkly. "You have almost unleashed a force so potent that none who have witnessed it come out of it unscathed."

"So what's in there, anyway? Anthrax?"

"Worse!" she hissed. "Much, much worse!"

"Well if it's so bad, why are you selling something so dangerous? I didn't see any warning s on it." Duo was becoming annoyed by the whole ordeal and his wrist was sure to have bruises from where her fingers were. _OZ could have used her as an interrogator_, he thought dryly. _She looks like the type of lady who eats small children and lives in a house with chicken feet_. Speaking of which, the old woman was looking at him in a strange way. She leaned forward and sniffed the lapel of his leather jacket. Duo jerked back in apprehension and a bit of disgust. He nearly fell as she released her vice-like grip as he stumbled.

"Old Spice," she muttered. "My son uses that cologne too." So saying, she turned and walked towards the counter, the bottle clasped firmly in her hand. Duo rubbed his wrist to try and soothe the angry red marks and trailed sullenly after her. "Tell me your name, boy," she commanded as she settled herself down on a three-legged stool and placed the bottle in front of her on the counter top.

"Duo Maxwell," the young man replied. "What's it to you?"

"My name is Gerda Kravitzky. I am a gypsy who has taken up residence in this town because I became too old to travel. But while age has weakened my body, it has only enhanced my special sight."

"Uh huh," Duo agreed skeptically. "Wufei has one of those. He called it a stigmatism, I think." He laughed. "I hid his contacts once and he tried to chase after me to get them back. It was hilarious to see him banging into everything!"

Gerda shook her head. "Not the physical sight, child. I am speaking of clairvoyance, prophecy, and destiny. I know all and see all!" The woman made a mystical gesture with her hands as if parting the curtains of time and space to see past, present, and future. Duo rolled his eyes.

"Sure....and if that's true, then how come you had to ask my name? Why couldn't you just, I don't know, look into your crystal ball or something?"

"Hush, child," Gerda whispered intensely. "All will be made clear in due time. Now, look into my eyes." She leaned forward towards him and he nervously took a step back, deliberately avoiding her gaze.

"Heh, yeah right, lady! What kind of idiot do you think I am? I've seen those movies too, you know. No way are you putting me into a trance!"

"Don't be impertinent!" she snapped. "It's customary for people to look at the person while speaking to them, not squirming about like a worm on a fisherman's line. Were you taught no manners?" Duo felt a blush creeping up his neck. Had he seriously believed for one moment that this loony old bat had the power to hypnotize him?

"I knew that," he stated defiantly, raising his eyes to hers as if daring her to prove him wrong. Gerda nodded once, and pulled out a deck of Tarot cards from beneath the counter. Duo saw them and felt a shiver run down his spine. He had seen Trowa messing with a deck of those once. He said he was reading his future. Duo hadn't believed him, at first, and had dared Trowa to do a reading for him. But the other boy had refused, adamantly saying that to do so would put both their futures in jeopardy if he misread a single card. Better to let the future remain a mystery, he had said. When the braided boy had asked Trowa what he had seen for himself in the cards, he had only smiled and glanced over at Quatre, who had been cooking at the time. Duo had scoffed, now completely convinced that Trowa had been pulling his leg the whole time and had felt rather irritated at the way the two lovebirds hadn't kept their eyes off each other all through dinner.

"Uh, I really have to be going now," he whispered, eyes riveted to the cards. "I have something important that needs to be done."

"Go if you wish," the gypsy stated calmly. "But I tell you, Duo Maxwell, the present you want to give is not something that can be placed in a box and gift wrapped." Duo felt his throat close as if some invisible hand were crushing the air out him. 

"W-what?" he stammered. "I don't know what you mean."

"Oh?" Gerda's hazel eyes pinned him to the spot. "Perhaps my vision is mistaken."

"We all make mistakes," Duo said evenly, trying to regain his normal breathing and heart-rate.

"I sensed that you had a broken heart." She caught the flash of pain in the violet eyes before it was quickly suppressed. "The one you love is in love with someone else, no? And he does not know of your love for him." Duo couldn't hide the shock this time as he stared at her.

"How did you know?" he asked. Then, with a rueful grin he chuckled. "Though I guess it's pretty obvious to everyone but...but him." The grin widened but became laced with cynicism that was twisted inward at himself. "Pretty deranged, huh? A nice guy like me falling for the wrong sort of guy like him...Sounds like a cheap romance novel." With a knowing smile, Gerda put away her cards. For this, she would not need them.

"Well, young man, have you told this boyfriend of yours how you feel?"

"Tell Heero? Hey, no way. You don't know this guy. He's the type who'd shoot you if you looked at him the wrong way."

"Ah, a...how do they call it these days? A 'straight' sort of boy, eh?"

"Yeah, definitely. And he has this girl who is crazy about him. She's rich and powerful and...perfect for him." Gerda cocked her head and toyed with the bottle.

"How so?"

"I have nothing to offer him," Duo replied bitterly. "She has, well, the world. All I have are a few baseball cards, some gum wrappers, and a little model of Wing Zero Custom I made myself."

"So, he loves her for her worldly goods?"

But Duo shook his head. "No. I think he sincerely feels affection for her. It's so hard to tell with him. He's not one much given to, uh, outward emotional displays." Duo broke off. He was quiet for a moment and the old gypsy allowed him his silence. At last he sighed. "Well, there is no help for it, I guess. They're scheduled to be married tomorrow. They'll be happy together, and he'll forget about me, even if I will never forget about him." Unshed tears glistened in his eyes as he studied the ceiling with a forced smile. "Hey, wanna know something crazy? I'm his best man. Kinda funny, ain't it?" He laughed then, a mirthless little sound. "Anyway, I need a present for the happy couple. Nothing too expensive or too flowery. Got anything that might work?"

Gerda was quiet for a moment, just looking at him, before at last sighing and pushing the bottle forward. "I believe that you already had chosen a gift. How would you like to pay for it?" Duo balked.

"But, I thought you said this stuff is dangerous!" he protested. 

"Only if you are not careful with it's use. You see, this is no ordinary perfume, but a magical love potion that will cause the user to fall in love with the first person they see. Husbands and wives generally use it to assure that their spouse never has dalliances with anyone but themselves." She paused. "But perhaps in your case, such a gift would only serve to enhance the agony of watching your beloved fall instantly in love with your rival." Duo shrugged and swallowed around the pain in his chest.

"I'll live. Knowing that he is happy means more to me than my braid. Besides," he added, a wistful not creeping into his voice, "I could never wish Heero anything less than something perfect; a perfect life for the perfect soldier."

* * * * * 

The ride back to the hotel was uneventful and the cabby was a quiet one, for which Duo was uncharacteristically grateful. He needed silence right now. After the weirdness in the curiosity shop, it was on natural for the boy to want some time to think over what had happened. The box that contained the fancy purple bottle he'd purchased sat in his lap so as not to slide all over the place on the seat. Taking off the lid, Duo carefully lifted the bottle out of it's bubble wrap and examined the top. Gerda had exchanged the glass stopper for one of those nifty little squeeze-pouches that would spray a fine mist over the user when pumped. Lifting up the end of his braid, he brushed the fine chestnut hair against his cheek absently as he stared at the gift. It didn't look like much, he mused, and it hadn't really been all that expensive. He wondered if Quatre would approve. Heck, he wondered if even he himself approved of it! Giving a perfume that causes everlasting love between people...It wasn't your every day, run of the mill present.

The cab hit a bump and the bottle's slick surface slipped from between his fingers, the top loosening slightly. But Duo didn't notice this, as he put it back into it's box. "Cabby, turn right here and park," he said. The man grunted and did as he was told. The yellow and black car pulled up alongside the curb. 

"That'll be-"

"Yeah, yeah," Duo interrupted. He fished a twenty out of his back pocket and tossed it onto the front seat. "Keep the change."

The cabby brightened noticeably. "Hey, thanks pal! Have a nice day!" Duo nodded, not really caring if he overpaid the man. He just wanted to get upstairs, wrap the present before Heero came back, and take a blisteringly hot shower. Sticking the box under his arm, the boy slid out of the cab and pushed the door shut behind him. He glanced up, craning his neck to see the top of the building where Relena had gotten them the penthouse suite for the special occasion. Not really knowing why, the image of Quatre with a pair of binoculars came to mind. He could just imagine the little Arabian scanning the ground below, his checklist in the other hand, as he waited impatiently for Duo to return. The thought made him snicker quietly as he walked through the revolving door, past the front desk, to the elevator. A keypad was above the normal set of buttons and he swiped the bar-code on the side of the room key over the scanner. It beeped and the doors closed, starting it's journey upward.

"Guuzen no deai ga mirai made kaete shimau," he sang to himself, feeling as if a snail could move faster then the slowly dinking elevator. "Kiseki o shinji na yo umaku iku sa. It's gonna be okay..." The elevator paused on the eleventh floor to admit a cute little girl dressed in a school uniform. She had a pair of cheap gauze angel wings on her back and a red horned headband holding her purple hair out of her face. In her hand was a can of whip cream. Duo did a double take and held the box a little closer to his chest.

"Hi," the girl chirped, pressing the button for the fourteenth floor. As the doors closed, she looked Duo over from head to toe and promptly inserted the nozzle of the whip cream into her mouth, spraying a large amount onto her tongue. While the innuendo behind that gesture was clear, the girl's age prevented his mind from being thrown into the gutter. He was positive that she had no idea how that move could be taken the wrong way. Almost, anyway. "You're pretty," she said as she smacked her lips. Duo smiled a bit at that.

"Thanks," he answered. The girl swallowed and took another mouthful.

"I like your hair, too."

"Thanks again." He cocked his head. "Why are you wearing wings and horns?"

The little girl giggled. "It's 'cause Mommy said I'm a little devil sometimes and Daddy says I'm his lil' angel." The elevator came to a stop and the doors opened. Skipping out, the little girl turned and did a wobbly curtsy. The doors started to close again. "Bye-bye pretty lady!"

"Bye, kid," Duo waved. Then, her words hit him. "Wait! I'm not a lady! I'm a-" But the doors cut off his protest. The last thing he heard was her giggle. Leaning against the railing as he continued to the top floor, he scowled at the shiny doors that reflected his expression. "Little devil," he grumbled. Then, remembering what she had said, he was forced to laugh a bit and shake his head. "Whatever." 

The corner of the box was digging into his ribs and adjusting his grip on it wasn't helping. He couldn't help it. The stupid thing was calling to him. Opening the lid for a second time, he lifted out the bottle. His conversation with the gypsy came back to him.

_So what's in there, anyway? Anthrax?_

_Worse! Much, much worse!_

"You don't look like much," he said out loud to himself, watching the way the glass caught the light. "I bet she was just trying to scare me so I'd buy it. Who believes in stupid things like love potions anyway?" Lifting the bottle to his nose, he cautiously sniffed it. "Holy-!" Coughing, he yanked the bottle away from his face, the top coming all the way off and falling to the floor with a clank. "Oh, jeeze! What the heck _is _this stuff?!" Continuing to cough, he attempted to wipe his watering eyes on his shirt sleeve. The fumes had been incredibly strong and had smelled richly of turpentine. Drawing in a few wheezing breaths, he glared angrily at the offending bottle. "Love potion, my ASS! This stuff could knock out a skunk!" To make matters worse, the fumes were leaking slowly out of the bottle in noxious magenta tendrils. "Oh no you don't! You're staying in there till I can find a way to get my money back!" 

Bending down to pick up the top, he hadn't noticed the elevator stopping on his floor or the doors opening. As he reached for the top, his foot accidentally kicked it out of his reach. "Dammit!" Walking forward and out of the elevator, still bent over, he stretched out his hand. Another hand slid under his over the cap seconds before his did. Looking up, his lavender gaze fell into Prussian blue. "Gyah!" he shouted, startled. "H-Heero! I, uh, I was just-" Suddenly he realized that his hand was still on top of the other boy's. The skin was so warm and smooth, crisscrossed with fine white scars that had come from working on his mech. Trying to still the rapid beat of his heart, he quickly stepped back and let Heero pick up the cap. Face expressionless, he held it out to the braided boy. Duo took it from him, trying not to notice how their fingers brushed. He clutched the bottle to him in one hand, the cap in the other, just staring.

Heero didn't change expression as he pointed. "What's that?" he asked. Duo looked down and came to his senses. He shoved the bottle into his jacket's inner pocket. It barely fit and seemed to be wobbling precariously. Shinigami attempted the wide-eyed innocent approach.

"What's what?"

"Don't play innocent with me," Heero stated, almost making his friend wilt. "I know that you're up to something."

"Who, me? Nah!" Duo laughed nervously. Heero's Omae o korosu glare darkened a fraction. Duo opened his eyes as wide as possible and gave his most winning smile. "Heero, is this the face of a guy who would lie to you?"

"Hnn." Leaning against the wall, he crossed his arms over his chest. "So where were you?"

Duo shrugged. "Out doing a few errands for the guys. No big deal. Hey, didn't you have a wedding rehearsal with Relena today? How did it go?" _Like I really care_, Duo added silently.

Heero's eyes narrowed. "You're evading the issue."

"You're probably right," the braided boy agreed amiably. "Well, pal, I'd love to stand here and be interrogated by you all evening, but Quatre is probably ready to ambush me as soon as I step through the door and I don't want to disappoint the little guy, ya know?"

"I'm sure he'll understand." Heero's Prussian blue eyes were trying to burn a hole through Duo's leather jacket. Duo laughed again, a visible sweat breaking out on his forehead.

"But you know Quatre," he wheedled, trying to get the focus away from where he was trying to conceal the bottle. "Do _you _want to deal with Trowa if the Q-man turns on the waterworks?"

"Why are you so jumpy?" Heero asked suddenly. The casualness of the statement contrasted oddly with the flat tone he always used.

"Uh...Too much coffee?" Duo winced as his voice cracked on the end of the sentence, making it go up into a high-pitched question instead of a firm statement of fact. Now Heero was absolutely positive that there was a conspiracy afoot and the last thing he wanted was for Duo to put joke powder into Relena's wedding dress or rig the corsage on his tuxedo lapel with a flower that squirted water.

"Whatever it is you're hiding, hand it over," Heero commanded, holding out his hand. Duo backed up a pace, flattening his back against the wall.

"I have no idea what you're talking about," he replied, trying to force indignation into his voice. One of Heero's arms shot out and blocked any further movement to the left.

"You're not going anywhere until I get what I asked for." Duo tried to make a quick escape to the right but found it suddenly blocked by Heero's other arm. He was pinned against the wall with the Japanese boy's face inches from his own. However much this situation would have appealed to him at another time, right now, it bugged the heck out of him.

"Dude, Heero! Knock it off! I'm not hiding anything, okay?" He shoved at one of the arms, trying to break through but he might as well have been trying to bend gundanium. "What's your problem?!"

"Whatever it is you're planning won't work, Duo, because I'm...here...to..." Heero's tirade wound down as he started sniffing the air. He made a face. "What is that repulsive smell?" 

_Crap! The bottle_! Duo tried to keep his expression neutral. Since Heero had been distracting him, he had completely forgotten to replace the cap. Even now, those dratted pink fume tendrils must have been leaking out. Shaking his head, he ducked and went under Heero's arm. "It's me. I, uh, I need to take a shower."

"That doesn't smell like sweat to me," Heero objected, snagging Duo's arm. "That smells like...turpentine or something." He felt the slight tremor that passed through Duo at the contact. His grip tightened as he took it for an admission of guilt.

"Ow, hey! That hurts! Ease up!" The two boys struggled in the hallway, one trying to keep a hold of the other lest he escape and the other trying to do just that. The two of them bounced into the walls until finally, Duo lost his balance, his feet becoming tangled up with Heero's. Down they went into a heap, Duo landing hard on his back and Heero on top of him. There came the sound of breaking glass and Duo felt sharp edges gouge him as the bottle shattered. From his jacket rose a cloud of pink smoke that filled the hallway completely. The two of them started coughing and gagging on the stench.

"What the hell is this stuff?!" Heero demanded, nearly choking.

"Aww, look what you did! You broke it!" Duo whined in frustration between coughs. After all that hard work to conceal it, after all that time freaking out in the gypsy's store...what was the point of it now? Tears stung his violet eyes and he blinked rapidly. Stupid fumes, making him cry... Heero had shifted above him, sitting up a bit while straddling his hips. Duo looked up though the haze of tears and mist and caught Heero's eyes with his own. "Well, I hope you're happy now. You ruined my wedding present to you. Now I have to go get anoth- HEY!" Heero was laughing silently to himself, which was a rare enough occurrence. He had turned his head to the side a bit and his shoulders shook with the force of his mirth. Duo watched on, hurt. "I'm pleased to see that my misery makes you feel good."

"Duo no baka," Heero whispered fondly. Wait, what?! FONDLY?! Duo had about three seconds to wonder what was wrong before a warm velvet mouth descended on his. He jerked his head back, but Heero was nothing if not relentless. Gently, he began coaxing Duo's lips to open under the firm pressure of his own, tongue tracing the sharp ridge of teeth before seeking to explore the soft contours of the other's mouth. Duo tried to push Heero away, his hands shoving at his friend's shoulders. Heero captured those hands and moved them down and around his back before using his own hands to stroke Duo over the denim pants he wore.

"Gyahhh, ahhhh," Duo said intelligently, breaking the kiss as he tossed his head back and arched into the touch. His mind swamped with desire and confusion, he was barely aware of Heero's nimble fingers tugging at the waistband of his jeans. When air that was several degrees cooler then his body temperature teased him through his boxers, he jerked back to his senses. With a yelp, he half sat up. Heero paused and watched Shinigami carefully. "What are you DOING?!" Duo demanded. Heero narrowed his eyes in a familiar gesture.

"I thought that was obvious," he stated. "I want you."

Duo blinked, his jaw nearly hitting the ground in disbelief. "You...want...what?"

Heero sighed in irritation. "I said it once and I'm not repeating myself. Now lay back and let me get these off of you." Duo half complied before he realized just what was going on here. Giving a strangled little scream he backpedaled away and hastily zipped his fly. Heero's expression hadn't changed. "Now what's wrong?"

"Wait, just hold on a second! You don't go around tugging off your friend's clothes in the middle of a hallway!"

"But I want you. Now." The way he said it spoke volumes for his sense of finality. What Heero set his mind to, he usually accomplished. Duo licked suddenly dry lips, trying to ignore the way Heero focused on his tongue and watched it intently as it moved. But somehow, Duo still had a hard time believing what his best friend had said to be the truth.

"Okay, Heero. Fun time is over. Stop playing these silly games."

"You should know me well enough by now to know that I don't play games," was the curt reply. Slowly, he crawled on hands and knees towards the now trembling Shinigami like a cat stalking it's prey. "Let me show you just how serious I am..."

"No, that's okay!" was the quick reply. "You just stay there and, uh, let me think about this."

"Fine. You have five minutes." Settling himself against the wall, Heero closed his eyes and appeared to go to sleep. Duo knew he was just mentally keeping time. He needed fresh air. The pink mist wasn't dispersing like it should be and it was starting to give him a dreadful headache. Looking around, he went to all the windows in the hall. Opening their latches, he let them swing open. The evening air washed into his face, stirring his bangs and starting to draw the fumes out of the building. 

"Ahh, much better. Now to puzzle this out." His thoughts were racing_. One moment Heero is being his customary cold self and the next he started kissing me. _That thought sent his mind back to the event. If he tried hard enough, he could still feel those silky lips against his own, a wet tongue sliding against his playfully. No, it wouldn't do to get bogged down in hormonal eye-candy, he realized. Best to focus on the topic at hand. So why had Heero changed? _Could it have been the work of the love potion? _"That's stupid," Duo scoffed. "Everyone knows that love potions are fake. That gypsy was just feeding me a line of bull to get me to buy the bottle." But what if she wasn't lying after all? What if the love potion really _did_ work?

"Okay, that's it! I'm not taking this ruckus any longer!" The door of their suite flew open and Wufei stormed into the hallway. Duo jerked as he heard the door open. He could barely make out Nataku's pilot through the hazy air which was, at least, slowly clearing.

"Wufei! Get back in the room now!" he shouted. 

"Maxwell? What is all this crap?!" 

Shinigami growled in frustration. "Nevermind that! Just get back in the room before it's too late!" Wufei opened his mouth to yell but inhaled a lungful of the noxious gasses instead. Coughing and sputtering, he stumbled back, right into Quatre who had been trailing behind him. The small blonde steadied him, wrinkling his nose at the pink fumes before sneezing three times in succession.

"Ewww! What's that icky smell?!" 

Wufei gasped. "Probably something Maxwell did, I'd wager! He always gets into trouble!" Looking up into warm blue-green eyes, he gave a small smile. "By the way, have I mentioned lately how..." 

"Wufei...?" Quatre's eyes widened a bit in confusion before softening into an affetionate look. "Wufei..." The way he breathed the name a second time made the other boy's hair rise on the back of his neck as a pleasurably tingling went down his spine. Wufei straightened up and cupped Quatre's face in one palm before pulling the Arabian close for their first tender kiss. 

"Mmm, Quatre," Wufei moaned. Duo groaned as he risked a glance to see the blonde pushing the Chinaman against the wall, lifting one of Wufei's legs around his hips with one hand as the other was trying to work it's way into his friend's clothing. Using his leg for leverage, the black haired boy held their bodies close and ground against Quatre. He spread openmouthed kisses against the Arabian's face and neck, his gold-toned skin starkly contrasting against peaches-and-cream. 

"Wait guys! No-....Oh never mind." _Too late now_. "Well, ya can't blame a guy for trying. I only hope Trowa's not going to shoot me when he finds out." Duo flicked a glance at Heero who was still sitting against the wall. How long had he wanted to do that to the perfect soldier? How often had he dreamed of seeing that hard shell crack and see the flames of passion sparking in those cool blue-grey eyes? Duo blinked and quickly looked away. _And how long was I standing there staring at him before he opened his eyes and started staring right back_? He refused to look at Heero but he could feel his gaze like a hot laser beam against the side of his face. 

"Have you decided?" 

Duo scowled. "Look, Heero. You're not quite yourself right now. Just try to pull yourself together for a moment so I can-EEP!" Strong arms slid around his waist and a nose began nuzzling his braid. "What are you doing now?!" 

"Since you obviously aren't going to accept the mission, I decided to pursuade you." Heero's voice sounded like he was planning on using torture instead of something romantic. Knowing him, he'd probably tie me down and use a cat o' nine tails on me or something, Duo mused. 

"Heero, you need to stop this...now." A knee nudged its way between his knees and rocked upward, pressing against his groin firmly. Duo gasped. "I mean it..." 

"You don't sound very convincing," was the monotone reply. "Do you think you'd like to be persuaded? I know a lot of ways to make someone give me what I want." Heero's mouth latched like a remora against the side of Duo's neck...right under his ear where it...oh GOD! Duo pressed into the knee this time as Heero's mouth teased the sensitive area and raised goose bumps all up and down his body. It was so wrong but...it was so hard to THINK through the sensations... 

"Yes....mmm....yes...." he panted, barley aware of anything at all. He was floating, like in a daydream. Maybe the potion _did_ hold some effect on him... Such thoughts soon lost meaning. Heero was there, sucking at his neck in a way that would soon lead him to orgasm if it continued. The knee between his legs rubbed and teased him, not touching the growing hardness that was becoming increasingly confined in his pants. The sucking lips pulled away from the red mark they were creating and took a soft earlobe to play with. Duo whimpered. "Oh no...please...." 

"You're so warm," Heero breathed, rubbing his hands up and down the braided young man. "I can't stop touching you...and I want you so badly!" Proof of his desire thrust hard against Duo's butt as the knee pressed upward again. "Come back to the room. We can get more comfortable there." He began guiding Duo, who was in no state to protest at the moment, towards the doorway which was still currently blocked by Wufei and Quatre. Heero gave them a dark look since they were interfering with his mission to get his partner into the sack. The two other boys were oblivious to anything else at the moment, however. Quatre had managed to push up Wufei's dark blue tank top and was rubbing his palms against two flat nipples, turning them into hard nubs. "Move," he commanded. 

"Make us," Wufei returned, turning lazy eyes to the perfect soldier. Quatre smiled sweetly and waved at Duo. 

"Oh, good! I always wanted to see you two together. Heero, be nice to Duo, okay? He likes you a lot." 

"He'll like me even more once I'm done with him," Heero promised, nudging Duo to start forward. A fuzzy part of his brain kicked in and he shook off the other boy's hand. 

"No, w-wait! We can't do this! Remember Relena? Heero, she's your bride-to-be!" the Deathscythe pilot stammered. Heero closed his eyes and looked like he was drawing on some private reserve of patience. 

"Duo, get in the room or I will throw you on the floor and have you right here in the hall." 

Duo swallowed nervously but found himself irritated at Heero's callous attitude towards all of this. "Oh, yeah? I'd like to see you try it!" 

* * * * * 

Trowa shut off the blow dryer and turned his head from left to right, checking his hair. Perfect, as always, and it completely concealed one of his eyes. The shower had felt great after all that time standing there for Quatre to measure. He could still remember his lover's impish look as he had measure the crotch of Trowa's pants. He had lingered longer than necessary down there. 

"Wow, Trowa," Quatre had giggled, holding up the yellow tape measure for the taller boy to see. "So big. Your crotch seam, I mean." Of course, that wasn't at all what he had meant and when Trowa smiled knowingly at him, he had blushed and lowered his eyes, giggling some more. So cute! Opening the bathroom door, he turned on the fan. Vapors from the bathroom circulated and flew out into the room. Unbeknownst to him, the faint tinge of pink that had leaked in was instantly negated by the hot, moist air. Heavy breathing accompanied in the background by a lot of screaming reached his ears. 

"What is everyone doing out in the hall?" he asked himself. He had been using the master bathroom in Heero's room since there were no dry towels in the one he shared with Wufei, Quatre, and Duo. Walking out of the room and through the small living room they had converted into a second bedroom, he turned the corner only to see... "Quatre?!" Trowa's normally soft voice rose into a shriek. Quatre looked up from kissing his way down to the waistband of Wufei's white pants. 

"Hi, Trowa! What's up?" he chirped brightly, before blowing a raspberry on the Chinese boy's stomach. Wufei's lips twitched into a smile as he affectionately ruffled the blonde head. Trowa's mouth worked but no sound came out of it. Eventually he pulled himself back together and closed his mouth. Finding something rational to say, he tried again. 

"Quatre, just what do you think you are doing?" 

"Hmm? Well, I was trying to make up with Wufei, here. Why? Am I doing it wrong?" 

"Mmm, not wrong at all," Wufei interjected. "Keep going." One of his hands was trying to guide Quatre's face to his obvious arousal. Something in Trowa snapped and his fist connected with the side of Wufei's face. The other boy went flying and landed on his knees on the floor. Quatre gave a strangled cry and ran to help the Chinese youth. 

"Keep your hands off of my lover," Trowa stated calmly. 

"You brute!" Quatre shouted at him with a glare. His eyes filled with tears. "Just because you're jealous doesn't mean you can go and hit people!" Turning his attention back to Wufei, he gently moved the boy's hand away to examine the strong red mark on his cheekbone. 

"Injustice, that's what it is!" Wufei snarled angrily. "If you weren't Quatre's friend, I'd show you some manners!" He leaned into Quatre's soft touch and smiled to erase the concern written on the blonde's face. "I'll be fine. Don't worry. I've been hit harder then that before." Trowa felt sick as he saw his lover lean in and gently kiss the forming bruise. This wasn't his normal Quatre. Something weird was going on, but he had no clue what had caused it. There was a lingering smell of turpentine to the air but besides that...The screaming continued and he recognized it as Duo's voice. Looking around he saw Duo apparently trying to throw himself out of one of the windows and Heero clinging stubbornly to his legs. 

"Don't make this any more difficult on yourself," Heero was saying. 

"You'll never take me alive!" Duo shouted back, trying to use the windowsill for leverage as he struggled. 

"Duo, if you fall out of this window, I will personally kill you when you land." 

"That...is...enough." Trowa's voice cut through the madness like a knife through butter. "I want an explanation of what is going on in this place." Walking over, he grabbed the back of Duo's jacket and hauled him away from the window. At first, he resisted even more, lashing out with a fist. Trowa grabbed his wrist and delivered a slap to the near hysterical Shinigami. Duo's eyes snapped open at the pain and he looked into Trowa's cool green eye before heaving a shuddering sob and throwing himself at the circus boy. 

"Thank God! You've come to save me!" he wailed. "I've made a terrible, terrible mistake!" Heero grabbed one of Duo's arms and tried hauling him away from the other pilot. 

"The only mistake you are making is keeping me waiting," the Japanese boy stated coldly. "Now come along!" Duo wailed even louder and clung to Trowa tenaciously. 

"No! Don't let him take me away!" 

"No one is going anywhere until I get an answer to all of this." Trowa's hand latched down firmly on Duo's other arm. "You're coming with me somewhere quiet so we can talk." He tugged one way, making Duo stumble a few steps in his direction before Heero pulled back. 

"I don't think so. He's coming with me!" 

Duo burst into tears. "I don't want to go with anyone anywhere!" he complained loudly. The two boys ignored his cries 

however as they continued a tug-of-war match over him. Finally, Heero reached behind him and pulled his gun out from the back of his spandex shorts. "Why do these things always happen to me?" 

"Back away slowly," the armed boy commanded. Trowa raised his hands and started backing away. While Heero was thus distracted, Duo took the opportunity to ram his elbow into Heero's gut, doubling him over. Clenching his fists together, he hit Heero as hard as he could on the back of the neck. The young man went down without a sound, the gun slipping from nerveless fingers. He wouldn't be out for long though. Taking the gun, Duo placed a quick rub on the back of Heero's head. 

"Sorry I had to do that, buddy. Let's just say it's a bit of payback for all the times you've gotten to hit me." Tucking the gun into his belt where it couldn't be seen under his jacket, he motioned with his head for Trowa to follow him into the room. The two guys entered, shutting and bolting the door behind them. Trowa leaned against the door, hands partially in his pockets as he watched Duo begin to pace nervously. 

"Well?" 

"Uh, it's kinda like this," the braided young man began. Quickly he explained his meeting with the gypsy woman, the power of the potion and why he had bought it, and he concluded with how it had broke. He pulled back his jacket and looked at the gooy pink blotch that had formed on his favorite shirt. "So the fumes went everywhere and Heero just happened to look at me. Quatre and Wufei came out when they heard us scuffling and they breathed in the stuff too. I opened the windows out there to get rid of the smoke before anything else happened. I guess it had thinned out pretty well by the time you came out." 

"You have the most positive knack for getting into trouble." 

"I'm glad you think so," Duo replied dryly. "Now could ya please try to be serious for once in your life?" Trowa didn't say anything, merely looked at the other boy from under his bangs. Duo sighed. "It was a joke, okay? You know. Ha ha, and all that? Sheesh!" 

"I see nothing humorous in this matter. Quatre is out there pawing all over Wufei and Heero was ready to commit murder over you." 

Placing his arms behind his head, Shinigami rocked back on his heels. "That's Heero for you; he's always been the extremist. All he had to do was ask nicely." The relative stillness of the room was shattered by an angry pounding on the door. 

"Trowa, let Duo go." Heero's voice was muffled from the other side of the door. More banging. "Duo, I know you can hear me. Open this door, now." 

"Go take a cold shower and then we'll talk," Trowa replied. The whole door shook as Heero decided brute force might be needed. The sound of a shoulder connecting with solid wood rang through the air. The Heavyarms pilot stepped away from the shuddering door. He noticed Duo's apprehensive look and shook his head. "Don't worry. That dead bolt is secure. I checked it myself when we first checked in." Duo cocked his head. 

"You still do that?" 

"Call it force of habit. Besides, aren't you glad I did?" 

The door shook again. "Um, yeah. Very. I always wanted Heero to be head over heels in love with me but...not like this. This is just, well, weird." He looked at Trowa who was once again staring out the window. "Well, my partner in crime, what are we going to do now?" 

"What _you_ are going to do is go back to that gypsy you met and demand that she give you the antidote to the love potion." 

"Hey! You can't just send me out there by myself! What if Heero mugs me on the street?" 

"You were the expert on stealth. I'm sure you can avoid being detected." 

"But we're talking about the perfect soldier, Trowa! He's the best there was! He'll find me and tie me up with one of those bondage balls in my mouth, or something. I'll never be heard from again!" 

"If you don't turn Quatre back to normal, I will personally weigh you down with cement and drop you in the deepest part of the ocean. Either way, your remains will never be found. Do you understand me?" Duo shuffled his feet on the carpet and grumbled something noncommittal. "What?" 

"I said it would be easier if I had someone to watch my back. You know, just to make sure I don't get waylaid." 

"I didn't cause this problem, you did. It's up to you to fix it." 

"Aww, c'mon Trowa! Be a pal and help a guy out! I told you it was an accident. I had no idea that this was going to happen." Duo came over and clung to Trowa's arm again. The other young man tried to shake him off but he held fast like glue. "Please? Pretty please? Pretty please with whip cream and a cherry on top?"

"Well, maybe. But only since you plead so nicely." This was said with a completely deadpan expression but Trowa's one visible green eye seemed to sparkle mischievously.

Shinigami laughed. "Hey, you made a joke! All right!" He pumped his fist in the air. "I guess there really is hope for you after all."

The Heavyarms pilot shook his head and extracted his arm from the braided youth's grip and straightened his sleeve. "You're completely-"

"Handsome? Charming? Witty?" Duo smiled and stretched. "Yeah, I know. But thanks for telling me anyway."

"Actually, I was going to call you dippy, as Quatre would put it."

"Oh." Some of the air had been let out of the young man at that declaration. "Anyway, about getting that anti-"

"Shh!" Trowa suddenly put his finger to his lips and frowned. "Hold on," he whispered. "Do you hear that?" Duo tensed. Together they listened intently, old instincts coming back to the forefront. At last he shook his head.

"I don't hear anything," he stated. Trowa nodded.

"Exactly. I think Heero is plotting something. I have this strange feeling that we're being...watched."

"Watched?" Duo repeated, his voice little more than a squeak. He swiveled his head all around as if expecting to see the perfect soldier standing in one of the corners. 

"Don't panic," his circus companion said softly, but whether he was saying it to calm himself or Duo neither of them were certain. "We've been in situations like this before. We're trained war specialists. We can deal with this." Duo whimpered.

"Yeah, but not when a love-sick psycho soldier is after me!" They fell quiet once again, one hoping for some hint of where the attack would be coming from, the other shivering with dread. _If he wasn't so demanding and persistent about this, I'd find the attention quite flattering. But right now, I feel less like a potential boyfriend and more like prey_. A scratching sound above his head made him jump. With wide eyes he hastily backed up and bumped into Trowa who steadied him. With a finger he pointed. "The air vent! He's in the air vent!"

"Are you sure? That's a very small space. Maybe it was just the heater kicking in?"

"No way! Wufei told us to shut it off, remember? He said he was tired of walking around in a tropical climate." The soft scraping continued until it was right over the air vent opening. Though it was too dark to see up inside, the two boys could almost imagine glowing Prussian blue eyes staring back at them. Duo had been in a lot of life-or-death situations before and he had faced them all with some degree of humor and bravery. But right now, he had never been more scared in his life. _If Heero catches me, Relena is going to kill me. No, **Zechs** is going to kill me....and slowly. _

"Quickly, open the window and start going down the fire escape. I'll meet you at the bottom in a second," Trowa commanded, giving Duo a shove. 

"But-"

"Just do it, or else we'll never get out of here." So saying, he ran off into the next room leaving Duo alone with his thoughts, his fear, and the occupied air vent. Casting it a nervous glance, he pushed open the window and climbed out onto the metal balcony that also served as a fire escape. With catlike grace he hopped down the grate stairs until he was one floor above the ground. Unhooking the ladder, he let it drop down with a clang and proceeded to descend it. His shoes hit the dirty and trash-strewn pavement of the sidewalk. He squinted at his watch and then looked at the sky. The sun was setting and the city lights were just starting to come on by the time Trowa showed up. Duo estimated that he had been waiting there for about ten minutes. 

"What took you so long?" he demanded crossly. "I thought ya weren't coming."

"I didn't want to leave Quatre and Wufei in the hall in case someone came by. The last thing we need is to be kicked out of the hotel." Using his head, he nodded in the direction of a few parked cabs waiting for passengers. "I suggest we hurry now before Heero makes it out of the air vent." They crossed the street at the crosswalk and stopped by a blue cab. "Excuse me, are you working right now?"

The cabby, an unshaven and ill-tempered looking man, glared at them. "What? Ya think I like ta just sit here and beat off in my spare time or somethin'? 'Course I'm working! Jeezus! Ya got somewheres ya wanna go Mack, 'cause I ain't gettin' paid for no chat w'itchu." The rear passenger door on the opposit side of them opened and shut as someone slid into the backseat. "Hey! What's ya problem?! Yous blind or somethin'? Can'tchu see that I'm tryin' ta pick up some passengers here? Beat it, shrimp!"

"Whoa," Duo said, raising his hands in a gesture of peace. "We aren't here to cause you any trouble. If someone else wants your cab, that's cool. We'll find someone else. C'mon Trowa." He attempted to pull the other boy away but a cool voice stopped him dead in his tracks. Heero leaned over the front passenger seat and pressed a fifty into the cabby's hand. 

"I don't think that will be necessary. Driver, take them where they want to go. We're all riding together." His eyes bore into Duo's lavender ones and the hint of a smile curved his lips. "The more the merrier." The cabby grunted and his thumb jerked behind him.

"Well, then get on in yous guys. Time is money and I don't got none to spare." With sense of despair, Duo opened the door and entered into the spider's web. _Some things you just can't fight_, he thought to himself, settling uncomfortably next to Heero. _And I guess this battle was doomed to be lost from the start. I don't know how he does it, but Heero has got to be the single most incredible guy I know_. 


End file.
